Wednesday, April 20, 2011

Dang-Blasted, Glass-Filled Cucumber Sandwiches and This Week's Other Mishaps














I have not been on top of my game for the past few days, especially in the area of food prep and transport. Let me give you a rundown of the worst three incidents:


Friday, April 15-I volunteered to provide a snack for my daughter's class. The day before, I baked four batches of mini apple-cinnamon muffins and cut up a bunch of oranges. Early the next morning, I proudly packed the muffins, oranges and some drinks in a basket big enough to float baby Moses down the Nile.
I got home from dropping off my daughter and the snacks only to realize that I forgot to pack the plates and napkins. Besides that, I forgot to send Calli's lunch with her, which would have doomed her to the cafeteria's options of fish nuggets or steak and gravy.


On top of all that, I had sent an envelope to school for her cafeteria account. The outside of the envelope said that it contained twenty dollars, but the check was still on my kitchen counter. So, back to school I went to deliver plates, napkins, Calli's lunchbox, and a check for the cafeteria.


Sunday, April 17-Our church's Childrens' Choir put on a wonderful Easter program. Following the program, everyone was invited to have a time of fellowship and refreshments. My plan was to contribute cucumber tea sandwiches for the refreshment table.


I put a great amount of care into my cucumber tea sandwiches. The English cucumber was scraped down with a fork before I sliced it, which made it look prettier. The pretty cucumber slices were then marinated in vinegar, water, sugar and salt. The bread rounds were cut into perfect circles with a biscuit cutter. I blended cream cheese, mayo, worcesterchire sauce and seasoning salt into a creamy spread to marry the cucumber to the bread.


Once I had assembled about three or four dozen sandwiches, I packed them for transport. They were divided amongst two Pyrex dishes and one plastic container. All of the containers, Skylar's diaper bag and Calli's clothes for the show were packed into my big basket (the one mentioned above that is big enough to float Moses and a week's worth of diapers down the Nile).


At some time during the drive to church the weight must have shifted. When I opened the hatch of my car, the basket crashed to the pavement. The horrible shatter of glass was followed by a mild expletive that came out of my mouth.


I looked around to make sure that nobody heard my utterance. Cussing in church is really bad. Saying a mildly bad word in the church parking lot cannot rank far behind!


Then, I took in the sad sight of my sandwiches. The cream cheese layer was the perfect adhesive for bits of glass. My beautiful little glass encrusted sandwiches were completely beyond salvage. Only the few packed in a plastic container survived the fall. One of the survivors is pictured above.


My mom saved the day by getting a nice cookie tray from a nearby grocery store. Thank you mom!


Tuesday, April 19-I tapped tiny holes into a dozen eggs, blew out the yolks with a coffee straw; then washed the eggs. As I admired my carton full of handiwork, I reached for my red cup of ice water. There was one problem. I also blew the egg yolks into a red cup. Instead of a mouth full of icy refreshment, I got a mouth full of slimy, salty gook. The taste was bad, the texture was worse!



Will I finally snap out of this whatever state I am in that is causing all of these disasters? Tune in for next Wednesday's post.

1 comment:

Sara Thompson said...

That is so awful - I've have periods like that. Just have faith that they do end.